Hometown Value

First of all, thank you for all of the support we have been given by our friends and family over this blog. We're grateful to have people that consider our thoughts and written words a worthy read. So thank you all!

Aaron and I have been really feeling a raw and rocky form of life for the past few months. Living in Birmingham is completely new. Well I’ve actually lived here for a couple years, but our lives look a lot different now with different circle of friends and people in general.

Growing up I found complete security in my family, friends, and sweet Fairhope. Moving to Birmingham has made me feel a level of fear and insecurity that I never thought was possible. Being away from everything I have ever known has made it so I regularly forget my value. When I was home I could walk in to Los Tacos and know exactly who I was, and my place in the world. If you have had to leave home and leave things that are familiar you know how earth shattering this feeling can be.

For the longest time I was incapable of putting my finger on the origin of my insecurity. I honestly thought that I was just losing my mind, or, of course, that it was Aaron’s fault. Knowing what makes me feel so much less valuable has aided in pursuing things that show me who I am. I, too, have felt this during this season. Its hard living in a place where you and your friends have been molded and then suddenly everyone starts moving away and you’re the only one that feels called to stay behind. I’ve felt my highest highs and my lowest lows in Birmingham and God has been faithful through it all. So I went from a countless number of friends and brothers doing ministry together, to just a couple faithful friends that have their own busy lives and schedules. So though Tori and I have different stories, we are no doubt in the same season of life.

This fight is not over; Birmingham still does not feel 100% like home. We know what we need though and we are pushing to get there- we are trying to get more involved in our church, it can be challenging and sometimes embarrassing trying to bulldoze into a group of brand new people and show them why they should love you. I could go on and on about that. But all I will say is that its so crazy how you feel like the most significant person in the room when you have that best friend with you and you know no matter how big of a fool you make yourself look, they are going to laugh and support you. Going from that scene to a scene of a new click of people that just don’t quite understand how dry of a sense of humor you have and crickets are just chirping away.  We have learned that no matter how uncomfortable though, the slightest bit of social effort on our part means something and makes us feel accomplished. Thinking about the great effort required in making a place for ourselves is comedic in comparison to what it is like in our hometown, but it is something that must be done! And there is so much reward in it. There are just as many incredible people waiting to be connected to us as we to them just around the river bend (stole that from Pocahontas). There is purpose where we have made our home. There are too many people in our circle of influence that we could benefit from by knowing them and could make us better. An example would be how much I’ve realized the substantial fulfillment I get while really valuing my time with my co-workers.

I hope that this can be of some comfort to anyone feeling alone or de-valued in a new place. God has been faithful comforting us and teaching us to expect to see him in day-to-day things. When life isn’t gliding by so quickly and easily its way easier to recognize how he answers our prayers

-Aaron -Tori